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A Real Tree-t: How To Be A Tree Looks Amazing

100 percent accurate lessons from real life

I hate being presumptuous, but I never really thought there was much to being a tree. Stand in one spot for (possibly) hundreds of years, absorb nutritious, delicious sun and water, play host to all sorts of scurrying furballs - it seemed like a pretty cushy gig.

How To Be A Tree, however, suggests that I was devastatingly incorrect. Sometimes trees get shot at by tanks while terrorizing hapless cities. Other times lasers attempt to impede their progress. It's rough, man. No wonder trees have such thick skin. It's the only way to endure ceaseless scorn from a world that just doesn't understand. There's a trailer of this wonderful oddity (that Graham took a look at a couple months ago) planted beneath the break's loamy soils.

It pretty much immediately reminded me of Incredipede's charmingly awkward movement, which is definitely not a bad thing. The various scenarios look increasingly bizarre and silly, featuring everything from platforming puzzles to giant tree-devouring mouths. Why do we play games if not for those specific things?

It should also be noted that creator James Andrews also helped make the equally delightful Realistic Kissing Simulator, so that's promising.

How To Be A Tree doesn't have a release date just yet, but it seems to be coming along nicely. While we wait, a question: what, in your mind, makes an ideal tree? What is the greatest, most powerful tree?

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Nathan Grayson

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