It's About Time We Write About Plants Vs Zombies 2

"Son, did I ever tell you the story of Plants vs Zombies?"

"Yes, dad, like, 20 time--"

"It was soooooo great. Made people go like this. I mean, plants? Fighting zombies? Hilaaaaaarious! But then it tipped its hat and rode off into the mobile/social sunset, never to be seen again. And we were like this. Lulllllz. It's been ages since then. I don't think you'd even been born yet."

"It's been four years. Really not that long in the grand scheme of things. I am 27."

"Well, I still demand a sequel. It feels like we've been waiting forever. And not a whisper from PopCap, either. They ought to title it Plants vs Zombies 2: It's About Time. Lolololololol."

"Actually, that's exactly what they're calling it. But I'm guessing it's actually a cheeky reference to some kind of time travel twist. Bolts in the logo, double-meaning in the title, etc. It's coming out this July. Are you even listening to me?"

"Sorry, too busy Vining this whole conversation."

[This has been an excerpt from the hotly anticipated upcoming novel, My Dad: The Internet.]

PopCap announced the cleverly titled sequel's full name and release month in a teaser video. You can view it belowabouts. There's really not much else to say at this point (remember kids, substance-free is way to be I guess), which is probably why I ended up writing, um, whatever that is up there.

If we're lucky, PopCap used the extra time to really evolve the PvZ formula for the better - not just add mightier lawn ents and creatures from the beyondest part of the beyond. If we really are in for a sci-fi change of scenery, I like our chances of getting something that's at least different - if not necessarily better. Potentially worrisome, however, is the prospect of incessant microtransactions. They certainly aren't out of the question with EA's green thumb sowing the seeds. I imagine we'll find out soon enough, though. But until then, this: