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4 days ago
Feature: Hardly kiss me
It has happened. The day spoken of in legend. After two years, I am finally to be set free of the Curse Of Steam Charts. All its taken is entirely leaving my job in four days time to end this purgatory. The only decision left is to whom I shall pass this vexation. That, and how to avoid mentioning the actual games for one more…
1 week ago
In Steve Hogarty's latest premature evaluation, he ascertained that it's totally worth simulating accurate battles in Totally Accurate Battle Simulator. One question, though, was left unacceptably ignored. How many hobbits does it take to kill a mammoth?
Feature: Visceral gameplay
Back at PC Zone magazine, where I was born out of an egg, it was my job to take the raw copy submitted by our freelance writers, strip out most of the sexism and veiled threats against politicians, and produce a polished and well structured review that was legally fit for publication. One of the most commonly deleted and cliched introductions to any game about…
2 weeks ago
Feature: Cogs and levers
As this is my penultimate edition of Steam Charts, before I return to nuzzle into the warm infinite belly of Horace for all of time, I thought it might be fun to take a bit of a look behind the scenes of Steam Charts, to see how this weekly column comes together. So, hey, join me as we step behind the curtain, and learn a…
3 weeks ago
Totally Accurate Battle Simulator is now in early access, totally
After yonks giggling at goofy GIFs of snake-firing archers and googly-eyed mammoths in Totally Accurate Battle Simulator, we can ourselves pit weird armies against each other in physics-driven foolish fisticuffs. Totally Accurate Battle Simulator entered early access today and yes, I know today is April Fools' Day but the launch is real. The contents of the game, perhaps less so. Did Vikings really carry longboats…
2 months ago
Meet the flying googly-eyed mammoths and yet more wonders of Totally Accurate Battle Simulator
Five months ago, I took a trip through Wilhelm Nylund's wonderful world of Totally Accurate Battle Simulator GIFs. TABS is a game about assembling stupid googly-eyed armies to fight other stupid googly-eyed armies, and Nylund is in charge of the unit design. The unit design is spectacular. TABS isn't out yet and we don't know when it will be, which sucks because Nylund's racked up…
6 months ago
Meet the snake-firing archers and other wonders of Totally Accurate Battle Simulator
Video games have been simulating battles since 1873, but none of them have the same reverence for historical authenticity as Totally Accurate Battle Simulator. It's an upcoming physicsy fightfest where you pit hordes of samurai, trebuchets and chicken men against mishmashes of rival units - not to be confused with Totally Accurate Battlegrounds, a spinoff battle royale game where you shoot stuff yourself rather than…
