Meet the flying googly-eyed mammoths and yet more wonders of Totally Accurate Battle Simulator

I feel your pain, Balloonman.

News by Matt Cox Contributor

Published on 4 Mar, 2019

Five months ago, I took a trip through Wilhelm Nylund's wonderful world of Totally Accurate Battle Simulator GIFs. TABS is a game about assembling stupid googly-eyed armies to fight other stupid googly-eyed armies, and Nylund is in charge of the unit design. The unit design is spectacular.

TABS isn't out yet and we don't know when it will be, which sucks because Nylund's racked up another five months worth of GIFs and I can't wait to start making my own. Until then, feast your eyes on the lethal bumbling of idiotic mammoths and the improbably-effective chopping of neck holstered axe-wielders.

Look, it's hard to describe the magic with words. There is a reason this post is 90% GIFs.

You might remember Totally Accurate Battlegrounds, a TABS spin-off project that recreated Plunkbat by way of goofy ragdoll physics. This isn't that, but fans of goofy ragdoll physics needn't fear their absence.

Hmm pic.twitter.com/Sukn8baO99

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 11 February 2019

This is most likely how the vikings used boats pic.twitter.com/SlGl7wq4kn

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 21 February 2019

Bamboozled by a rock pic.twitter.com/eEE0cTnCmw

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 13 February 2019

Where is it!? Get it off me! pic.twitter.com/0d7mAxChC3

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 5 February 2019

Our game is odd pic.twitter.com/0hVdmVHCQy

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 4 February 2019

Was trying to film a gif of the minotaur when this guy figured out how to use a shield to fly pic.twitter.com/Kfv1EEU7Or

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 28 January 2019

While it might not seem like a very good idea, my simulations have shown that the neck holstered axe technique is very effective pic.twitter.com/eRLnQ5Cqst

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 18 January 2019

Just walk away pic.twitter.com/uqTXNaYPhS

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 11 January 2019

I think I messed something up when I tried to add slight size variations to the characters pic.twitter.com/9h8lXiPiCG

— wilhelm nylund (@wilnyl) 10 January 2019

I'll leave you with Balloonman, the hero we don't need or deserve, but definitely identify with.