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Steam Charts: Parabolic Edition


Come one, come all, but not all at once or you'll break our caching, and see the Steam Charts in all their glory! Which game will have reached the coveted #2 position this week?!

10. Life Is Strange: Before The Storm

There was a once a king with three daughters. He was a wise and brave king, well loved by his subjects, respected by his peers, and intellectually feared by the royalties of neighbouring kingdoms. But a time had come when this king had become very old, and even in his fierce determination, had begun to show signs of frailty.

"Who shall inherit my kingdom when my day has come?" asked the king of his three daughters, during a dinner to which all three had been invited.

9. Arma 3

The first daughter Helen, the eldest and strongest, made her case first.

"Father, it is I who should inherit your kingdom, for I have shown strength in the face of adversity, fortitude in times of difficulty, and passionately defended your name when slandered. In these ways I will continue your rule."

8. H1Z1: King Of The Kill

The second daughter, Anna, waited until Helen had finished speaking, and calmly cleared her throat.

"Father, I believe it should be me who takes your throne, as I have demonstrated a mental acuity rivaled only by your own. In the face of adversity I have counselled wisely, during times of plenty I have suggested efficient economic guidance, and when difficulty decisions have had to be made, I have advised with wit and care. In these ways I will continue your rule."

7. Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six Siege - Year 2 Pass

The third daughter, Claire, said nothing. For she was not at the dinner at all, despite the invitation. Instead, upon receiving the summons had realised that both of her ambitious sisters would certainly attend to petition their cases, ensuring that their quarters would be left empty.

At this very moment she was filling her pockets with the most precious items she could find in her sisters' rooms, while her footman prepared her horses nearby.

6. Grand Theft Auto V

Both Helen and Anna looked around for their sister, so consumed by their own intentions that it was not until this very moment that they had noticed her absence. Then, at the sound of a horseman's cry and the galloping of hoofed feet outside the palace window did they begin to suspect something was amiss.

Their father, however, was not taken aback in the least. For he had known from the very moment of his penning their invitations that Claire would not attend the dinner.

5. Counter-Strike: Global Offensive

As both sisters hurried back from the windows, having seen their youngest sibling's carriage disappear through the palace gates and onto the Western road beyond, their minds raced at what might have happened. Both were equally bemused that Claire would have abandoned her opportunity for royal ascension, and the power and riches that accompanied. At this moment maids burst into the room to inform the princesses of their stolen goods, leading to great commotion and consternation.

But not from the king, who sat in his chair at the table and continued to eat his meal.

4. Divinity: Original Sin 2

When all had calmed down, and the two remaining sisters had taken their chairs, their thoughts quickly returned to the matter in hand, both recognising that their chances had increased from one third to one half, both more eager than ever to know who should become the next queen of the land.

But their father said nothing, finishing the last of his meal, his expression inscrutable.

3. XCOM 2: War Of The Chosen

Finally he spoke, and both sisters found their breaths catching in their throats as they waited to hear who would take the throne.

"Anna, Helen," began the king, speaking slowly and carefully. "It shall be your sister Claire who shall be the next queen of this realm."

2. NieR:Automata

Both sisters stared in astonishment. "What?" they both cried with one voice. Then speaking over one another began to protest.

"But father," pleaded Anna, "What manner of test is this? Claire's actions undermine your whole rule!"

"But father," begged Helen, "Surely you do not believe this to be some display of strength or cunning from our cowardly sister!"

1. Playerunknown's Battlegrounds

The king replied to neither, and simply laid his crown upon the table, as the doors to the dining hall broke open and the men holding swords and flags burst in.

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In this article

Arma 3


Counter-Strike: Global Offensive

PS3, Xbox 360, PC, Mac

See 8 more

Divinity: Original Sin 2

PS4, Xbox One, PC, Nintendo Switch

Grand Theft Auto V

Video Game

Awaiting cover image

H1Z1: King of the Kill

PS4, Xbox One, PC

NieR: Automata

PS4, Xbox One, PC

PUBG: Battlegrounds

PS4, Xbox One, PC

Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six Siege

Video Game

XCOM 2: War of the Chosen

PS4, Xbox One, PC

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John Walker avatar

John Walker


Once one of the original co-founders of Rock Paper Shotgun, we killed John out of jealousy. He now runs buried-treasure.org