Posts Tagged ‘free games’

Free Loaders: Learn To Dance Like A Child On Sugar

Okay, look. I know you’re all off playing No Man’s Sky (hell, I’m playing No Man’s Sky right now) but if you could just find it in your stupid heart to look at this, you’ll be a happier person for it. You’ll drink, you’ll wear some excellent clothes, and you’ll dance (oh how you’ll dance!) Have you ever danced so hard your body started flailing like a cola-fuelled toddler? And yet, you knew, and everyone around you knew, that this – THIS – was how people truly dance. Well, that is how you will dance tonight.

Read the rest of this entry »

Free Loaders: Help There’s Frogs In My Computer

I didn’t mean for it to get this bad. They’re just harmless frogs, right? How was I supposed to know they would take over my life like this. I’m warning you, reader. Stay away from the frogs. Do not let them take you. Do not lose your freedom, like I did. Do not become a servant to their digital whims. No, don’t click to find out more. Get away. Get away.

Read the rest of this entry »

Space Oddity: Eerie Wandering With Inside The Void

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: several spaceships and their crews have gone missing around a remote alien planet and you’re sent in to find them. Must an FPS, yeah? An action-RPG, maybe? Nah mate, Inside the Void [official site] is a first-person walk-o-explorer. It’s a flipping gorgeous one too, and spookier than I’d expected. It’s free t’boot so do have a look if you like a good wander.

Read the rest of this entry »

Free Loaders: Make A Spaceship Out Of Pirate Pieces

I was planning to focus this week’s round-up of free games on a watercolour-based walking simulator with lots of flamingos, until I saw that Alice had already coochy-cooed over it. And now I have to write about another spaceship game. A bloody spaceship game in which you have to salvage the pieces of your enemy and click them onto your blocky, Frankenstein vessel and then go shoot things. Okay to be honest I forget why I was complaining.

Read the rest of this entry »

Foot Hell: Ashi Wash Introduces Awful Japanese Spirit

Hell is other people’s toenails. The worst feeling in the world is being woken by someone else’s toenail scraping down your calf. Escaping that is 90% of why I married the sea. Perhaps Japan understands this awfulness better than any country, as evidenced by a folklore creature named the Ashiarai Yashiki. This awful filthy foot stomps into people’s homes and demands they clean it (it is a talking foot, naturally). Hell. You can experience a bit of that terror in Aki Wash [official site], a wee free game about cleaning an Ashiarai Yashiki threatening to smash you. It has the very worst toenails I’ve ever seen in a video game.

Read the rest of this entry »

Revenants (Whoa-oh!): BrainBread 2 Out Free For Source

If you’ve been slaying zombies for a few years, you may well have come across the Half-Life mod BrainBread, an FPS splashing in a touch of action-RPG as you and your pals cut down zombie hordes. I think I remember it as being fun for a bit? Hazy mod memories. Point is: now BrainBread 2 [official site] is out for free. The sequel shambles in the Source engine, naturally, and brings several co-op and competitive modes.

Read the rest of this entry »