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Posts tagged “Steam Charts”

Feature: Chilling charts

Steam Charts: Prematurely Spooky Edition

It’s Halloween (month)! I don’t know about you lovely lot, but there’s nothing I find more spooky or chilling than charts detailing what the most popular video games are in a given week. That's me, Fraser, filling in for John who is on holiday. A terrifying holiday, I bet.

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Feature: Finally some expertise

Steam Charts: Flibble Glibble Pants Edition

Daddy: Hey Toby, can I get your help with some work please? Toby: OK, but they might be disappointed I'm a cat. This week on Steam Charts, my three-year-old son tells us all about the top ten grossing games on Steam.

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Feature: Shadow Of Their Former Self Charts

Steam Charts: Reshuffle Edition

Take last week's Steam Charts, give them a little shuffle, and then breathe out a long, despondent sigh. Oh, and then entirely randomly add an Early Access racing sim. And then start sighing again, and never, ever stop.

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Feature: From: Aunty Jill

Steam Charts: Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: Edition

Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: steam Charts will PAY $2 for evry time u forwad this Article.# If you do not fwrard this article to TEN of you're Friens YOU WILL DEFINITELY DIE!!!!!!!11

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Feature: New Entry Bonanza!

Steam Charts: Crikey! Edition

I imagine in direct response to all my moaning insightful criticism, everyone in the world has upped their game and started buying some more interesting games from Steam. Such that this week's Steam Charts, with an extraordinary four new entries, barely resembles those of the last couple of months! Hurrah! And you clickbait won't believe clickbait where Playerunknown's Battlegrounds falls this week! CLICKBAIT!

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Feature: Everyone is dreadful

Steam Charts: Morbidly Repetitive Edition

Thank God you're here. Listen, I don't want to over-hype things, but this might be the most essential and life-changing article you ever read. Because if you only click through to read this, you will LITERALLY find out the top ten (nine) grossing games on Steam last week, and seriously, if you bought one of them, you will feel so bloody validated.

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Feature: Steamy Windows

Steam Charts: Stale Blood Edition

The grim effects of the Steam Summer Sale are finally wearing off, and we've got a bunch of new entries this week! Along with, of course, the usual hoary old guard of dreary regulars. So hold my hand as I guide you through the most exciting article of your life.

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Feature: Monstrous

Steam Charts: Entirely Original Edition

OK! OK! Look, thank you, yes, yes, I know, thank you. Yes, it's very exciting that I'm here with this week's Steam Charts, but come on, please, sit down now, that's really enough. Oh, come on, all of you, you're lovely, but it's only little me. Goodness gracious!

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Feature: Recharted territory

Steam Charts: Life Changing Edition

Welcome to the Award Winning Steam Charts! Yes, you heard that right! I wrote "Award Winning"! It hasn't technically won any awards, but since everyone can agree it should have, it seems like it would almost be lying not to write it. But enough about how bloody brilliant I am, here are the top grossing games on your Steams this week.

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Feature: It's no one's fault but your own

Steam Charts: There Are Consequences Edition

Words are ill-equipped to describe how dull this week's Steam Charts truly are. Read on to see how I combat that. But also, thank goodness there's at least the interesting feature that Plunkbat has, for the first time since it shot to the top of the charts on its release, dropped to third place. Its year-long grip on the top spot was beginning to waver…

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Feature: Steamy Windows

Steam Charts: Moderately Entertaining Edition

Hello! Goodness me, it's good to have you with us. If you're reading this sentence on Steam, then I simply implore you to click through to the site to read what has been described by Simon Pulitzer as "the greatest games journalism the world has ever been blessed to receive."

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Feature: Something's fishy

Steam Charts: Perfectly Normal Edition

Welcome to my nightmares. As chronicled last week, all human progress is wiped out by a Steam Sale. Where once we were a species that revelled in new, interesting ideas, pursuing our dreams, we are once more wedged neck-deep in the past, doomed to buy the same £40 five-year-old games until we rot and coagulate into a molten horror. Welcome to the Steam Charts!

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Feature: Set sale for savings!!!!!!!!!

Steam Charts: Stale Of The Century Edition

I have reached a conclusion. Everything that's bad is the fault of Steam sales. Two weeks ago these charts had reached a place of being a fertile ground of interesting new games and discounted classics. Today, they're back to being mostly a miserably predictable list of games that even the undiscovered tribes of Papua New Guinea have on their Steam accounts.

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Feature: Welcome... to Jurassic charts!

Steam Charts: the past returns to life in summer sale

Hallo! Me again, filling in (slightly late) while John is handcuffed to a steering wheel for other duties. The Steam Charts were all shook up (mm mm mmh!) last week by the launch of Steam's summer sale, including propelling a lump of hardware into the top ten for the first time in ages. A number of older games have rocketed back too, boosted by sale…

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Feature: Dinobores

Steam Charts: What The Heck Is Happening Edition

As you stare out into the world, at the tumult and turmoil, perhaps you feel the only hope is to turn to the Steam Charts for its comforting predictability and stability. I'm sorry folks, but it's all gone batshit crazy in here too.

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Feature: Sometimes not everything is awful

Steam Charts: Change Is Possible Edition

"Miss, Miss, it's so sunny, can we have Steam Charts on the field?" "NO. Sit down and write about popular PC games in this oppressively hot room until the DAY YOU DIE."

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