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Posts tagged “Steam Charts”

Feature: Chart it good

Steam Charts: I Was On Holiday Last Week Edition

I, Alice Bee, have returned from a week off and everything has changed. Matt is in the office now, and complained about having to get up at 8.15am. This complaint made me furious and I am telling everyone. My desk has been moved. There is no milk in the fridge. I am confused, and I can't remember all the HTML codes to write this very…

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Feature: Cyberian Desert

Steam Charts: Do U Cyber Edition

Beep boop. I am the SteamChartBot, and welcome to the CYBERCHARTS. They're like the regular charts, but they have the word "CYBER" shouted at the start, and that makes them really bloody cool.

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Feature: Chartist rebellion

Steam Charts: The Other Alice Edition

Hello! This week John is doing a super secret special mission (playing a video game) so I, one of the other Alices, have taken over the Steam Charts. I am afraid that I do not put as much time as John into constructing elegant jokes that are several layers deep, though, which means you might even be able to tell which games are charting. I…

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Feature: The Runs Down

Steam Charts: Sexy AF Edition

QUICKLY! FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, QUICKLY! I've written the charts and there are some jokes and you have to read it! One of the jokes is quite good!

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Feature: Now feat. even more fish!

Steam Charts: Aquatic Craniate Edition

There are weeks when the Steam Charts surprise us! There are weeks when interesting new and old games reappear, pushing out the dreary regulars! And then mostly there are weeks like this one, where it's so depressingly bland that it starts raining outside the moment you glance at it. Not good rain, just bland drizzle.

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Feature: Irredeemable

Steam Charts: Red Dead Redemption 2 Edition!

OK, look, it isn't a Red Dead Redemption 2 edition, because Red Dead Redemption 2 isn't out for PC yet. But if I keep typing Red Dead Redemption 2 into this Google is going to be SO TRICKED and the clicks will pour in and Graham will give me a promotion!

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Feature: The end times are pricey

Steam Charts: Up Is Down Edition

Please check to see if your cats are laying down with dogs, and if your downs are presently up, because it'll only further confirm this week's Steam Charts' signs of the end times. SEVEN new or re-entries, no GTA, no Counter-Strike, no Witcher 3 - and please, look, sit down, make sure a relative or loved one is close by - Plunkbat is at #6.…

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Feature: Chilling charts

Steam Charts: Prematurely Spooky Edition

It’s Halloween (month)! I don’t know about you lovely lot, but there’s nothing I find more spooky or chilling than charts detailing what the most popular video games are in a given week. That's me, Fraser, filling in for John who is on holiday. A terrifying holiday, I bet.

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Feature: Finally some expertise

Steam Charts: Flibble Glibble Pants Edition

Daddy: Hey Toby, can I get your help with some work please? Toby: OK, but they might be disappointed I'm a cat. This week on Steam Charts, my three-year-old son tells us all about the top ten grossing games on Steam.

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Feature: Shadow Of Their Former Self Charts

Steam Charts: Reshuffle Edition

Take last week's Steam Charts, give them a little shuffle, and then breathe out a long, despondent sigh. Oh, and then entirely randomly add an Early Access racing sim. And then start sighing again, and never, ever stop.

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Feature: From: Aunty Jill

Steam Charts: Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: Edition

Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: steam Charts will PAY $2 for evry time u forwad this Article.# If you do not fwrard this article to TEN of you're Friens YOU WILL DEFINITELY DIE!!!!!!!11

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Feature: New Entry Bonanza!

Steam Charts: Crikey! Edition

I imagine in direct response to all my moaning insightful criticism, everyone in the world has upped their game and started buying some more interesting games from Steam. Such that this week's Steam Charts, with an extraordinary four new entries, barely resembles those of the last couple of months! Hurrah! And you clickbait won't believe clickbait where Playerunknown's Battlegrounds falls this week! CLICKBAIT!

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Feature: Everyone is dreadful

Steam Charts: Morbidly Repetitive Edition

Thank God you're here. Listen, I don't want to over-hype things, but this might be the most essential and life-changing article you ever read. Because if you only click through to read this, you will LITERALLY find out the top ten (nine) grossing games on Steam last week, and seriously, if you bought one of them, you will feel so bloody validated.

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Feature: Steamy Windows

Steam Charts: Stale Blood Edition

The grim effects of the Steam Summer Sale are finally wearing off, and we've got a bunch of new entries this week! Along with, of course, the usual hoary old guard of dreary regulars. So hold my hand as I guide you through the most exciting article of your life.

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Feature: Monstrous

Steam Charts: Entirely Original Edition

OK! OK! Look, thank you, yes, yes, I know, thank you. Yes, it's very exciting that I'm here with this week's Steam Charts, but come on, please, sit down now, that's really enough. Oh, come on, all of you, you're lovely, but it's only little me. Goodness gracious!

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Feature: Recharted territory

Steam Charts: Life Changing Edition

Welcome to the Award Winning Steam Charts! Yes, you heard that right! I wrote "Award Winning"! It hasn't technically won any awards, but since everyone can agree it should have, it seems like it would almost be lying not to write it. But enough about how bloody brilliant I am, here are the top grossing games on your Steams this week.

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Feature: It's no one's fault but your own

Steam Charts: There Are Consequences Edition

Words are ill-equipped to describe how dull this week's Steam Charts truly are. Read on to see how I combat that. But also, thank goodness there's at least the interesting feature that Plunkbat has, for the first time since it shot to the top of the charts on its release, dropped to third place. Its year-long grip on the top spot was beginning to waver…

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