Hello, you. Hard truth: It's time you played some side-scrolling platforming, isn't it? I know, I know, you keep saying you will make time for it, but you just end up running errands or doing overtime. Well that has to stop. It's time for you and side-scrolling to remember why you love each other. Spend some time gazing into each other. Perhaps then you'll either get married or finally realise that it's time to move on. It's for the best.
But look, I'm no counsellor. I'm just saying that there's a one-level demo of Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams, which is just what you need to deal with your left-to-right issues. Or maybe you just need more space. I don't know.