We Can Finally Solve Real-Life Beefs In Diablo III

You! Yeah, you! I am enraged in you general direction. Are you manly enough to fight me? Yeah? Crap. I thought you might back down and run away. Erm. Can I interest you - OW! - please stop, and I'll pay you - NOTTHEFACE - I have money! Take my watch! It's my birthday and I've just wet myself. Just please stop pummeling me... Man, did I just learn a lesson: real-world violence solves nothing, causes bruising and pain, and might even result in soiled underwear. From now on I'll be doing all my fighting online, and Blizzard will soon make it possible to do so in Diablo III. The next patch will deliver a basic PvP structure to their game. Finally!

The missing PvP component has been one of the more obvious missteps from a game that never quite got its footing. If you're going to demand that players need to be connected to the internet, at least give them a good few reasons to be online. At least Blizzard are still plugging away, and they've just announced that patch 1.0.7 will bring player duels to the game.

It's not a huge update, but I expect those still clicking will appreciate it. The new location, the Scorched Chapel, is segmented into four new zones: the church, the graveyard, the river, and the lake. Up to four players can fight. PvP being built in a safe zone. It's opt-in to prevent player vs player combat spiraling out into griefing. To this end, there's literally no point to the violence. No leaderboards, no betting, no objectives. It's possibly a meta-comment on the nature of violence, but the exact opposite of why most people play games. Maybe it's just too tough to balance between the player's builds, so they decided to take out any rewards?