Today brings a new four-hour version of the irredeemable Justice League film, the infamous 'Snyder Cut' made at great cost because fans demanded it. Mystifying. But it does make me wonder: which game would you like to see get its own Synder Cut-style revamp? I'm not asking which game Zack Snyder should take a pass at, because too many games already have bad writing and gratuitious slow-motion. No, I'm asking which game's creators should receive a big sack of cash to revel in self-indulgence with a new expanded edition.
We need to establish some parameters. You can't want simply a remaster. You can't wish simply for a binned level to be rebuilt. If we're talking Snyder Cut-grade overhaul, it has to be excessive. The game must lean into itself, hard - to a degree many would consider a fault. No room for subtlety or reserve here.
I'm swinging for the fences: I'd go for a Metal Gear Solid V that's even more Metal Gear Solid V-y. It's already a fantastic game, one of the best stealth games ever made, but it does feel distinctly unfinished. So let's change that. More missions. More cutscenes. More exposition. More monologues. More globetrotting. More warpals. More Metal Gear timeline tomfoolery. More base-building and man-snatching. More pop music. More Huey being the absolute god-damn worst. More branded tie-ins with spectacle companies. More of whichever actor currently occupies Hideo Kojima's daydreams (introducing a digitally de-aged Mads Mikkelsen as a young Solidus Snake?). And please, so many more stealth abilities and systems with weird niche uses and fascinating interactions. I just want to see what would happen.
Though I do realise that the rules I have established would mean even more awful things happening to women. And we can never ignore the risk of Jared Leto's presence. As the warning goes: those who live by the Snyd shall die by the Snyd.
What game would you like to see get a self-indulgent overhaul, reader dear? Think carefully, because the fact that Zack Snyder's Justice League blights this world shows that your wish could come true if you shout enough and a company is desperate enough.
I've just now remembered that Kojima supposedly did have full control to edit and direct a Phantom Pain trailer, and it's so extra that yes absolutely let's do this. No regerts.