You Are So Predictable

The latest creepy output from Valve's ever-watching stat-o-tron reveals how we, the human animal, play Team Fortress 2. And, well, everything you've ever moaned about during that one match where it was so unfair because they had too many of this and they did that and God, I might as well just stop playing if you're going to be like that is, as it turns out, pretty much true.

It's mildly distressing how absolutely it confirms everyone's suspicions and stereotypes about the game. Yes, there are more rushy-bastard Scouts than any other class. Yes, campy-bastard Snipers earn the most points. Yes, hitpointy-bastard Heavies get the most kills. Yes, hidey-bastard Engineers live longest. And so on.

What's slightly odder is the breakdown of which side wins most frequently on each map. BLU has the edge in every killing field except Dustbowl and Gravelpit. Why? How? I thought we were all the same! Damn you for not being neater, demographics.

The heat maps that reveal the most common death locations are a giggle, too. Here's 2Forts:

Who'da thunk it?