Everyone, hold onto your hats. I have some shocking and unbelievable news for you, and they may use your brief window of vulnerability as a chance to escape. So, remember when Alan Wake's American Nightmare not-so-silently planted its flag of star-spangled terror in Steam's registry? Turns out, that wasn't just some incredibly unlikely fluke that had to pass across the desks of many intelligent people! It is, in fact, coming to PC - on May 22 no less. This has probably never happened.
The pseudo-sequel sees Wake battling tooth, nail, flashlight, and gun against Mr. Scratch, who's described as "a supernatural serial killer fixated on Wake’s wife, Alice, and even more horribly, Wake’s demise." In the process, he'll "learn to control reality itself and unravel the secrets of Night Springs" - which sounds pretty roundabout to me, but then again, all my supernatural serial killers have just turned out to be Old Man Jenkins in a costume attempting to frighten gullible kids away from the Mummy's Gold.
The requisite "high-resolution graphics and enhanced PC features" are also in the cards, as is a "Fight till Dawn" mode - which is basically horde mode, but with more whooOOOooOOO [sounds of chains rattling]. Oh, and this bit sounds nice:
"In celebration of the impending launch, Remedy is offering gamers a motherload of discounts on Alan Wake. Pre-orders of American Nightmare on Steam or GOG will receive 10% off their purchase. For purchasers of the original Alan Wake, an additional 15% off is available! Alan Wake is now part of Steam’s Midweek Madness (only 72 hours!) available at 50% off. This offer is also available on GOG."
And yes, that does mean American Nightmare will soon be living the DRM-free dream on GOG as well. So, in short, good news all around. Well, mostly. Alec enjoyed the original's setting well enough, but found every waking moment of Wake action to be rather flat as far action-heavy horror games go. And apparently, American Nightmare puts action in the monster-disintegrating spotlight even more often, so hopefully Remedy's added a few extra pumps of intrigue to Mr Wake's coffee this time around. We shall see. In the meantime, put down your flashlight and pick up your, er, air guitar with this tonally inconsistent trailer.