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Diablo 3 Is Certain, Possibly, Or Not

Those vague rumours and wispy mistruths that spread across the internet every day... well, they're the great, aren't they? Today's whispered perhapsment: New Diablo 3 under development rumblings.

The reason I like this rumour so much is because it's so impossibly vague, and yet here I am writing it to fan the flames. Why? Because I believe that once a consensus is reached it's very hard to stop it from being true. I mean, Clinton's not resigned, Obama claims victory, and the media goes along with it before the votes are counted. So it's true, isn't it? Let's all keep stating that Diablo 3 is definitely being developed, and one day Blizzard will just discover they've been unwittingly making the game for months. This is Science, people. The rumour's source:

Via Blues, according to Blizzplanet, who have been shot down recently for other Diablo 3 claims, a translation of the German PC Action's next ish blurb. You think that's vague? Read the translation:

"We found out some secret information about a much awaited game, from a very well known game developer, whom we can't name. Sounds extremely important, doesn't it? Let's say: Pure thought about it makes our bedsheets wet. Got any ideas? Post them in the comments. Even if the hell froze and cows gave beer - we would spill nothing out!"

That's right. A website that last month printed false rumours about Diablo 3 has printed rumours based on a next ish blurb from a German magazine that says it's got a story about a big game from a famous developer (that makes them wee (or worse) in their beds) that might, but possibly might not, have something to do with cows and hell.

It's certain! Pre-order your copy now!

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John Walker avatar

John Walker


Once one of the original co-founders of Rock Paper Shotgun, we killed John out of jealousy. He now runs buried-treasure.org