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The new Lord of the Rings: Gollum trailer takes its collars very seriously

Getting dressed must be Mordor

Though this short new look at The Lord of the Rings: Gollum shows more of the producer’s face than the game, there is some new stuff in there for you LOTR nerds. We get to see Mirkwood, which looks lovely. We get to see Gandalf. But, most impressively, we get to see the Mouth of Sauron, aka the Lieutenant of Barad-dûr, who is taking his collar game very seriously. That's very obviously him in the header image.

His outfit is wreathed in teeth, stretching his neckline out far beyond what you’d consider acceptable in any other profession. To be honest, even one tooth would seem iffy to me. I’m not sure how he functions in that outfit. I’d be constantly knocking out molars on doorways and catching that magnificent backpiece on my chair. Noodles would be off the lunch menu. But he doesn't care. He's already outdone everyone else. He'll happily drink his lunch through a straw.

I’m less impressed with Legolas’s dad, Thranduil, who looks like he fell into a sales bin at a garden centre. He tried, and wearing a fence around his neck shows impressive commitment to his station, but he’s been outperformed and knows it. Look at that face.

A blond elf from The Lord of The Rings: Gollum, whose collar is made from lots of little wooden sticks

Gandalf is Gandalf. He has a beard and a teepee for a hat. His collar is perfunctory, but acceptable when you consider his lifestyle choices.

Gandalf from The Lord Of The Rings: Gollum, with a very large hat and a big furry collar on his coat.

There is some also footage of Gollum scampering along and climbing, and Mirkwood does look like a nice place to visit, though he'll be sneaking around it like every other area he visits. He's hiding from everyone because he's managed to annoy every single person in Middle-earth, you see, which is a pretty good premise for a stealth game when you think about it.

Alas, we won't be playing Gollum this year. His quest for his precious was delayed into 2022.

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