"Warr! Huah! Yeah. What is she good for?" I like to think Philippa would open this post with. "Being furious about pencils," she might say next, "but also writing this post about the release date of Total War: Attila." My Pip fanfic - Pipfic, I call it - has yet to capture her tone, cadence, diction, humour, or any other aspect of her writing or personality, but I like to think I'm improving.
Sadly, we're stuck with me writing about this. Sorry. Attila: Total War is scheduled for release on February 17th, 2015, publishers Sega announced today. Also they revealed stuff about pre-order DLC with proto-Vikings and the game's Special Edition. Pip would do this far better.
February 17th, then, is the magical day when Total War will visit the dying days of the Roman Empire (those Byzantine posers can do one). It'll also bring the launch of the Viking Forefathers Culture Pack, a DLC pack that'll add the Danes, Geats, and Jutes, each with their own units, missions, and traits for £6. Unless you pre-order or buy the Special Edition, that is, in which case you're paying for them with trust (also money). While I can't condone pre-ordering, I suspect Total War fans probably know what to expect by now.
The Special Edition also includes a biography of Attila, and a poster with the campaign map on one side and "a comprehensive playable faction reference guide" on t'other. Sega haven't said how much extra that Edition will cost.
(For the record, I think Edwin Starr's follow-up song Stop the War is underrated.)