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Have You Played... Alice: Madness Returns?

You talkin' to me?

When your name is Alice you either get people singing that song at you, you know, that song (none of us think it is funny please don’t do it), or cracks about Alice In Wonderland.

I was either going to have to play all this American McGee nonsense or insist that I would never ever play it ever. In fact, I played Alice: Madness Returns before the first one, and I do think it’s the better of the two.

I do always squint a bit at some of it, especially the asylum sub plot, which is tropey, and some of the very consciously gothic (or, you know goffic) stuff. But it has some amazing set piece moments that I still think about sometimes, years later. Just those things that make you go “Oh wow!” and acid etch into your brain.

I remember collecting sleepy oysters under the sea, those poor little sleepy oysters, and the vorpal blade that goes snicker-snack. I especially remember half falling, half jumping through bright blue skies onto playing cards in the air. All in all I think the game has more to recommend it than the 2010 film version. It doesn’t have Johnny Depp in it.

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