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Have You Played... Realm Royale?

A more thoughtful-nite

Let’s travel back in time. To the distant year 2018.

We’re at peak Fortnite. Ninja urges a new year’s crowd to floss with him as rain beats down on his sodden bandana. Water seeps into his suit, into every fabric of his being. The flash of his smile is the only source of light, but it’s a bit too bright. He begins flossing. The sound of awkward shuffling blurs with the music. My eyes shatter into a thousand pieces.

During this was also the peak of game studios being like “Battle Royale equals money”, so along came Hi-Rez with Realm Royale. As you’d expect, players drop onto a map, there’s a ‘deadly fog’, yada yada. But you know what? This actually has a few fun twists on an overused formula, so much so, I consider it some of the most fun I’ve ever had with a Battle Royale game.

Even Big Matt Cox was a fan. Shame it’s been left to crumble to dust. It certainly didn’t take off like the devs wanted, so they moved onto other things. So think of this now as more of a eulogy.

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First thing: Realm Royale lets you hop on a horse to traverse the map, which cuts down on those mind-numbing, hold sprint moments. It gets you into the action a lot quicker, and you can roam together on horseback like a band of cowboys.

Easily the most unique thing about the game are forges. At a forge you can craft powerful gear with stuff you’ve collected across the map. It’s incredibly satisfying watching shiny loot pop out of the furnace, and there’s nothing like hearing the clank of a hammer in the distance, bursting into a forge on horseback, and stealing an enemy’s freshly baked goods.

It saddens me to think only a handful of people probably play this game now. It was genuinely fun, with zero building nonsense and some smart ideas. No flossing, either.

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