If you click on a link and make a purchase we may receive a small commission. Learn more.

Zam! Kapow! Wonk! Telltale's Batman Ep 2 On the 20th

Send in Joel Schumacher

"Bring back Joel Schumacher, all is forgiven," our Alec said in his Wot I Think of the first episode of Telltale's Batman series [official site]. Not a fan, that one. Found it a bit tedious, he did. Too familiar a Batstory. And I'm totally with him - I miss Joel Schumacher's Batman too. So look, here's the news: Episode 2 of Telltale's Batman will arrive on September 20th and it will be named Children of Arkham. Now that's out the way, we can focus on imagining Joel Schumacher's Batman - The Telltale Series.

I get it: Bruce Batwayne is a serious man with serious issues. I've seen the films, read the comics, and watched the TV show. Nowadays I understand he's committing mass murder and speaking in a voice so low only whales can hear. He's also a big ol' goofball larking about in a make-believe world wearing his jim-jams, and I'd like to see more of that fella in video games.

I want Batman grinding his Batsoapshoes down a dinosaur:

I want goofy gangs covered in neon paint:

I want imagery without the slightest shred of subtlety:

I want car chases down the arms of colossal statues:

I want Batman tripping his tits off at a grubby charity auction and trying to buy a date with Poison Ivy using his GOTHCARD:

I want even more neon gangs:

I want pick-up lines like "I'll bring the wine, you bring your scarred psyche."

God help me, I even want these stupid bastard puns, plus at least one awful pun as an option in every conversation:

Maybe for season two, yeah Telltale?

About the Author

Alice O'Connor avatar

Alice O'Connor

News Editor

When not writing news, Alice may be found in the sea.

Join the Rock Paper Shotgun supporter program

Sign up today and get access to more articles like these, an ad-free reading experience, free gifts, and help us create more great writing about PC games.

See more information

Comments

We love having a friendly, positive and constructive community - you lot are great - and we want to keep it like that. Our main commenting rule is "be excellent to each other". Please see our code of conduct, where you can find out what "be excellent" means. TL;DR? Respect others, think before you post, and be prepared for puns.

More News

Latest Articles

We've been talking, and we think that you should wear clothes

Total coincidence, but we sell some clothes

Rock Paper Shotgun Merch