Here's a fascinating fact: Steam Charts has never won an award. I KNOW. If there's nothing else that demonstrates the corruption of the entire system, it's this. High quality, groundbreaking, Woodwardian journalism, are just some of the terms I use to describe this most esteemed of columns. And yet the silverware shelf gathers dust. It's a disgrace.
Grand Theft Auto V
1 day ago
5 days ago
It has always amazed me that Grand Theft Auto Online (and its parent game, Grand Theft Auto 5) hasn't had a casino until now, what with it being all about a life of vice and high-stakes action. Next week on Tuesday the 23rd, Rockstar are fixing that, and opening the doors to the Diamond Casino & Resort. As with other GTA Online expansions, players will…
1 week ago
It's another dire old week in Chartland, with the last breaths of the Summer Sale ensuring, with the exception of spots #4 and #5, that all the usual suspects dominate. But we won't let that change us! We're better than this! We're going to have fun anyway!
2 weeks ago
Yes, yes, it's me. I know, I know, but calm down. While it's obviously very exciting to have a celebrity as handsome and excellent as me writing you some Steam Charts, I'm still just a regular ordinary guy underneath it all. I leap into my trousers both legs at once, same as anyone else.
3 weeks ago
I think I have everything necessary for an ace Independence Day beach bash. ☑ Sexy Uncle Sam outfit. ☑ As many beers as can fit into the pockets of a Sexy Uncle Sam outfit. ☑ Stars & stripes face paint. ☑ Stars & stripes monster truck. ☑ Flare gun. ☑ Homemade firework launcher. So why am I being riddled with bullets, bumped by hoverbikes, and…
If there's one thing that's guaranteed to sweep through the Steam Charts like a giant fart, it's a Steam Sale. Blowing out all the fresh, original or interesting new releases, the mid-year discount warehouse (Junction 45 off the M91) ensures it's a top 10 of games you already bought or decided you don't want to buy. So who is buying them? Baddies. You lot are…
4 weeks ago
Hello friendly people! Welcome to the always-lovely, always-cheerful soft-play-of-fun-and-hyphens that is Steam Charts! Today we're going to laugh together, learn together, and maybe, just maybe, if we're lucky, laugh and learn a little. Please, pull up a trouser, take a seat (take as many seats as you need - we have too many seats), and prepare to enjoy, laugh, and maybe even learn.
1 month ago
I'm declaring it: this is the Worst Week Ever for Steam Charts. And let's face it - this is entirely your fault. If you were a better person, you'd buy better games. But instead you buy the same eight bloody games every bloody week, and then buy a game that isn't even out for over a year. A YEAR! You are awful, and you do…
This week: Rude swears! Writing about more interesting games than the ones you boring people keep buying! And battle advice to people who've been dead 1,800 years! It's some Steam Charts.
2 months ago
Good hello. Please, grab hold and sit, for this is some Steam Charts.
Hello person. This is the Steam Charts, the weekly round-up of the top-grossing PC games on the online store Steam. We write it cynically to collect your clicks, and then we take those clicks and we use them to poke innocent orphans in their stupid orphan eyes.
Our former John (RPS in peace) has vanished in odd circumstances, last heard claiming he'll be flying through the sky in a big metal snake, so I'm taking over this week. Not even an employee anymore and he's still making work for me. Join me for a stroll down the hit parade to inspect last week's top-selling games on Steam.
WARNING: If you're reading this, there is a very strong chance you're looking at news on your favourite game. Please, it's imperative you click on to discover crucial information.
3 months ago
Hello, and welcome to RPS's weekly round-up of the top selling games on Steam for the last weeeeee... WHAT?
It has happened. The day spoken of in legend. After two years, I am finally to be set free of the Curse Of Steam Charts. All its taken is entirely leaving my job in four days time to end this purgatory. The only decision left is to whom I shall pass this vexation. That, and how to avoid mentioning the actual games for one more…
4 months ago
As this is my penultimate edition of Steam Charts, before I return to nuzzle into the warm infinite belly of Horace for all of time, I thought it might be fun to take a bit of a look behind the scenes of Steam Charts, to see how this weekly column comes together. So, hey, join me as we step behind the curtain, and learn a…
As time inexorably ticks away, its guttural screaming horror counting down the seconds until our infinite deaths, it's important we remember what really matters: that the game you like best isn't as good as the game I like best. The game you like best, the game you like reading about the most, is indicative of how foolish you are, how you're wasting your precious moments…
John had the presence of mind to take today off, after flying back from San Francisco on Sunday. Young Matt and I got a red eye that took off on Friday night and landed on Saturday afternoon. I didn’t sleep for 30 hours, then slept for 12, was wired for the next 16, and then slept for another four. Which brings us to today, when…
Oh hello! John is away in San Francisco gobbling up gum left on the underside of chairs at the Game Developers Conference, so I'm filling in for our regular rundown of last week's top-selling games on Steam. As is customary for weeks where I need to take over, the charts are full of the surprises he grumbles they never have. What can I say, John…
Hahaha, I can't believe you think the game you like is good! The game you like ISN'T good! Your liking the game you like makes you look just SO silly. Find out which games everyone else likes, and then start liking those games instead, with our handy Steam Charts guide.
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